Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Originally Posted on Thursday, February 7, 2008

I wrote this on my personal blog in February...

if he brings you to it...
sometimes, for brief monents, i'm 7 years old again, and i'm thinking about what my life will be like 20 years in the future...and then i come back to reality. two years ago my husband and i made the decision that it was time to start a family. i always dreamed of what it would be like to hold my children in my arms, watch them grow up, take them to reds games, the park, to be a mom. two years later, we are starting the adoption process. we've been down a long road, allbeit not as long as some, of tests and medications and trips to the doctors and negative tests, and wishing and hoping and praying, and cliches. about 3 months ago we both sat in church and heard a newly adoptive parent talk about the experience, and how God calls us to love the orphans, and bring up a new generation that will love God and chase after Him...and we both got that big lump in our throats, the kind of lump you get where you can't swallow, and you know you are being called to action. since then, the feeling has only gotten stronger, and people who have also adopted have been placed in our lives...and then we got the pricetag. it doesn't seem right that 2 people with good jobs, who own a home, and who really want nothing more than to have children and live the American dream should have to pay that much money for a child. a living breathing human being who just wants to be loved and cared for as much as i want to love and care.i have several thoughts about all of this, the primary being if God has a hand in it, he will find a way to make this happen financially. second, be careful what you wish for...2 months ago, i publicly declared that 2 of my biggest dreams were to travel to europe before i turn 30, and to have children...Russia is the current county of interest, and i will be 30 in 2 years, the approximate length is will take to see this all through....sigh...

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